When you’re just hooking up with women, then their marital status probably isn’t of much consequence to you. Unless your morals tell you not to, it isn’t a big issue to have one fun night and then be done with it. Once you take that next step and start dating her, though, it’ll really put a damper on things if you find out she’s married. It doesn’t necessarily mean the end of the relationship, but it does mean that you can choose one of these three options.
Obviously, the easiest option here is to give up while you’re still ahead. Her husband hasn’t found out, you two aren’t too serious yet, and if she’s keeping secrets like her being married then it’s probably a bad sign anyway. At this point, you can get out scot-free and move on to other, more single women. This is the best choice if you aren’t attached yet, but things don’t always work out that way. It’s okay – you don’t have to ditch her if you don’t want to. There are still two more options.
Keep It Quiet
“Don’t reveal your relationship secrets”
If you’re a good secret keeper, then you can try keeping the relationship quiet. If she’s cheating with you, then there’s probably something missing in her marriage. She might not love her husband, or he might just not be giving her what she wants. It’s easy to be the other guy in a relationship, as long as you keep it on the down low. A lot of men can’t accomplish this sort of relationship because they get jealousand possessive.
If she isn’t ready to leave her husband, then you have to accept that you’re going to be a third wheel for as long as the relationship lasts. For men who aren’t willing to share, then it’d be best to just move on. Very few women actually leave their husbands for the men they have affairs with. The best thing to do is to accept that sad fact and move on. If you don’t want to keep it a secret, though, there is one last option.
Suggest a Three-Way
“This might work”
Okay, this sounds a little outlandish. A surprising number of couples are looking to have a three-way; it’s just a matter of bringing it up. If she’s married and you want her husband to know about you, then have her propose a three-way. Some men would be totally put off by this, but you might be surprised. If their sex lifehas been lacking so badly that she’s started sleeping around, then he’s surely aware of the issue as well. A three-way could be just what he needs to bring that spark back, and he’ll be grateful for the opportunity. If he’s on board with it then that’s awesome – you get to keep screwing his wife, and he knows all about it. You probably won’t be able to be romantic, but at least you’ll get to see her. This option is less dangerous than keeping secrets from her husband.